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Damn Near Dead Panel

Saturday, September 16


Charles Ardai
Ray Banks
Aldo Calcagno
Bill Crider
Sean Doolittle Graham Powell
Gerald So
Jason Starr
Duane Swierczynski
David Thompson
Sarah Weinman

David Thompson: hey, Harry Hunsicker was just at the store for a signing, and he wanted me to say to everyone... so "hi"

Bill Crider: Hi, all. And Harry, too.

Duane Swierczynski: Hey, Bill.

Graham Powell: Hello.

Charles Ardai: Wait till you see the cover of my next book -- a beautiful naked woman holding a gun and covered by nothing except a stuffed teddy bear.

Charles Ardai: Jeez. Now Bill and Harry must be wondering what the hell I'm talking about.

Graham Powell: "She bears it all!"

Gerald So: really, Charles?

Bill Crider: Anytime you mention a naked woman and a guy, I figure it's okay, no matter what you were talking about.

Charles Ardai: Yep. Wish there were some way to upload the art. Really snazzy.

Jason Starr: Save that for cover of Bust part trois

Duane Swierczynski: "Bare"

Graham Powell: Part *trois*?

David Thompson: hey, when is BUST 2 out?

Charles Ardai: BUST 2 will be out next October.

Jason Starr: Part three will be called........BARE

Charles Ardai: Assuming that Jason and Ken finish writing it this October...

Duane Swierczynski: Raymundo!

Ray Banks: Well, ain't this a fine collection people?

Graham Powell: No, not really.

Ray Banks: Y'know, I still haven't read BUST. I probably should, shouldn't I?

Jason Starr: October, October

David Thompson: cool... can't wait!

Bill Crider: If you haven't read BUST, you should be doing that, not this.

Jason Starr: Thanks, the way....can't resist asking "Hot enough for you?"

Graham Powell: I told them it was (duh!) hot in Texas.

Duane Swierczynski: We should all team up and ask Graham questions.

Jason Starr: Loved Red White and Blue Murder, the one I picked up in Houston

Bill Crider: Hot, humid, and nasty. The swamplands. But you know what happens if you ask that question, having read the book. Glad you liked it.

Duane Swierczynski: "Which story did you read first, Graham? Was it mine? Did you like mine best?"

Graham Powell: No.

Graham Powell: Actually I'm old-fashioned - I read them in order.

Charles Ardai: Are there any civilians here, or just us old pros?

Jason Starr: whoops

Charles Ardai: ("We" old pros?)

Graham Powell: "Old"?

Duane Swierczynski: "Us"?

Bill Crider: There's only one really Old Guy here.

Charles Ardai: Well, 'old' seems to fit today's theme.

Duane Swierczynski: Charles, before I met him, I swore he was 60-something.

Charles Ardai: Though I was thinking it's a little funny to hold an event for DAMN NEAR DEAD online...when most of the people we were writing about probably aren't big users of the Internets.

Duane Swierczynski: Very true. We should at least TYPE IN ALL CAPS

David Thompson: lol

Sean Doolittle: ha

Charles Ardai: I'm curious: How many people here have actually had experience w/ a geezer criminal?

Ray Banks: Depends how old a geezer is.

Sean Doolittle: Thanks for the greetings, everybody. I'm still trying to figure out what the hell window I'm supposed to type in.

Jason Starr: KEN BRUEN HERE...............HOW ARE YOU ALL?......................................................

David Thompson: oh, bullshite

Jason Starr: sorry, couldn't resist

Charles Ardai: Let's say a geezer is anyone 20 years older than you are at any given point in time. (So when you're 18, 38 is a geezer.)

Duane Swierczynski: My God. Ken is a senior citizen, isn't he?

Graham Powell: There was a car chase in Houston with a 50 year old on the lam from a robbery... of a dry cleaner's.

Gerald So: all right. let's introduce ourselves to start.

Charles Ardai: Ah, 50. That's a baby.

Bill Crider: We had the question about what a geezer is when we did a panel on DAMN NEAR DEAD at ConMisterio. Nobody knew.

Jason Starr: Jason

Duane Swierczynski: I'm Swierczynski. I play bass.

Bill Crider: Bill

Gerald So: Gerald

Graham Powell: Geezer is a state of mind.

Ray Banks: Ray

David Thompson: David

Charles Ardai: I'm Charles Ardai, though today I think I'm wearing my "Richard Aleas" mask.

David Thompson: no, Charles, because "Fathers and Sons" was an Ardai story ;-)

Graham Powell: Graham. I play the drooms.

Duane Swierczynski: (nice Beatle accent there, Graham)

Jason Starr: My grandfather....well the current guy my grandmother is living 98....was a low level mobster in 20's and 30's.....

Charles Ardai: Oh, that's good. The closest I come is my father, who's been in jail twice.

Gerald So: If you have a question for anyone, type ?, I'll acknowledge you, then go ahead with your question.

Duane Swierczynski: My grandfather used to run numbers and liquor back during Prohibition... so my dad tells me.

Bill Crider: ?

Charles Ardai: (Not for anything particularly cool. Still, that's a 75-year-old jailbird.)

Gerald So: Go ahead, Bill.

Bill Crider: This has absolutely nothing to do with DND. But I want to know from Charles if Peter Jackson's going to direct HER MAJESTY'S DRAGON. Or whatever the right title is.

Charles Ardai: He hasn't decided yet, as I understand it. He's said he plans to spend the next little while directing THE LOVELY BONES and having his special effects studio, WETA, work on designs for the dragons.

Jason Starr: Hey, Ray, is Guthrie gonna show?

Charles Ardai: But I get this all indirectly, from reading articles online and such. Naomi's the one who actually talks to PJ, not me...

Ray Banks: You never know with Guthrie - he does keep strange hours.

Jason Starr: I mean being that y'all are married an' all?

Ray Banks: Heh. Engaged to be married, J.

Jason Starr: Cool

Duane Swierczynski: Which means Al doesn't put out yet.

Ray Banks: He refuses to set a date.

Jason Starr: Union Libre as we Mexicans say

Graham Powell: Actually it means he hasn't stopped. Yet.

Gerald So: ?

Sean Doolittle: Go ahead, Gerald :)

Bill Crider: Gerald is trying to get control again.

Gerald So: Do any of you have a favorite story in DND, and what is it?

Charles Ardai: I'm extremely fond of Megan Abbott's.

Graham Powell: Oh, man, why you gotta go there?

Ray Banks: I have a major soft spot for Duane's.

Duane Swierczynski: Aw.

Gerald So: it's open-ended, Graham. :)

Duane Swierczynski: Actually, at the risk of this being a cricle jerk... I'm still googly-eyes over Bill's.

Bill Crider: Duane's hit me in a soft spot, too.

Duane Swierczynski: I loved that it was a sequel to his Blog project story.

Jason Starr: I like Megan's as well, very much.....I haven't read them all yet because my copies haven't arrived yet.

Sean Doolittle: I haven't gotten my copies yet either :)

David Thompson: i know Jason...i am VERY late... this one-man operation thing puts me behind on everything... you should have them on monday.

Sean Doolittle: Just busting chops, David old man. . .no worries.

Jason Starr: Yeah, no big deal at all!

Charles Ardai: Megan has expanded her story into a short novel that I read the first half of, and it's just brilliant. S&S is going to publish it under the title QUEENPIN, I believe.

Graham Powell: Duane's and Megan's were great, Victor's was great, and I really liked John Harvey's.

David Thompson: present company excluded, my favorites are Laura Lippman's and Charlie Stella's... i love the aging porn star and elderly telephone porn ring.

Gerald So: Diplomatic. :)

Duane Swierczynski: Oh yeah.

Duane Swierczynski: And Gischler's "Duffers" was just nuts.

David Thompson: and megan's is BRILLIANT, as bruen would say

Gerald So: so detailed, Megan's was.

Duane Swierczynski: ?

Gerald So: Go ahead, Duane.

Charles Ardai: It was a great idea for a theme anthology. Really got the old brain cooking. Inspired a lot of good ideas.

Duane Swierczynski: This is for any contributor. How hard was it to write a story featuring a geezer character? Did the story come easy? Or was it a... bear?

Bill Crider: ?

Charles Ardai: Inside-baseball question: Have you submitted copies of the book to the Edgar judges yet?

Jason Starr: Yeah, I saw it was submitted.

David Thompson: yes, i submitted it to the edgar's earlier this month.

Charles Ardai: Great!

Bill Crider: How's the book doing, David?

Jason Starr: It's funny....Ken has, like, ten stories eligible

Ray Banks: I couldn't believe the Dagger nom - it's like he's ESTABLISHMENT now

Gerald So: Duane asked was it easy to write a story with a geezer character.

Bill Crider: When you're my age, it's easier to write a geezer than a teeny-bopper. Or whatever they're called now.

Jason Starr: I thought it was pretty easy, yes. Well, easy for a guy who doesn't find writing short stories very easy

Ray Banks: It was easy enough, I suppose. I'd already written it. So it was even easier.

Charles Ardai: Geezers are easy to write because they don't move around much. They're like turtles.

Duane Swierczynski: 'TIS FOOKED...........

Jason Starr: Ken!

Ray Banks: Easy, Kenneth

Sean Doolittle: It was so easy that I wrote mine for a completely different anthology. Victor Gischler read it and said, "This should've been for Duane's book."

David Thompson: i swear, it's a bruen type-alike contest

Gerald So: I saw that Jason's was inspired by his grandmother's significant other.

Ray Banks: Which anthology, Sean?

Jason Starr: Well, the voice was....not the total nastinees and self-involvement

Sean Doolittle: Wall Street Noir. What does a kid from Nebraska know about Wall Street? Exactly what I said.

Gerald So: Duane impersonated Pelecanos once, too, at a chat.

David Thompson: you can discuss corn futures

Duane Swierczynski: That's never been proven in court.

Jason Starr: Megan Abbott is Pelecanos in a skirt...right, Charles?

Sean Doolittle: heh heh

David Thompson: Murder by Ethanol

Charles Ardai: I think she was Lehane in a skirt. Someone else was Pelecanos.

Jason Starr: Oh, right...Theresa

Duane Swierczynski: Al Guthrie is Pelecanos in a skirt.

David Thompson: lol

Ray Banks: Pelecanos is Al Guthrie in a skirt

Charles Ardai: That's a kilt, damn it.

Jason Starr: And Ray is Lehane in a skirt

Ray Banks: I've seen kilts - that ain't no kilt.

Graham Powell: Megan is Patricia Highsmith reincarnated.

Ray Banks: And that isn't his sporran.

Charles Ardai: Man, now you're getting mean.

Sean Doolittle: what's a sporran?

Charles Ardai: Highsmith was bad enough the first time around, I hear...

Charles Ardai: A sporran is that little dangly thing that keeps your kilt down.

Ray Banks: Part of the haggis family, but while the haggis is a roving one-legged baldy thing, the sporran is hairy.

Sean Doolittle: Hairy sausage. Got it.

Graham Powell: To clarify: Megan WRITES LIKE Patricia Highsmith reincarnated.

Jason Starr: I hope so

Jason Starr: :)

Graham Powell: Highsmith was from Fort Worth, believe it or not.

David Thompson: ?

Gerald So: Go ahead, David.

Gerald So: then Bill, sorry.

David Thompson: i have a question for Charles... do you ever see HCC doing an anthology, and if so, a particular theme?

Charles Ardai: The folks at Dorchester hate anthologies and have basically forbidden it.

Charles Ardai: But I do think about it from time to time.

David Thompson: groovy

Gerald So: Go ahead, Bill.

Charles Ardai: Maybe for our 50th title.

Bill Crider: My question was for David. I wanted to know how the book was selling. I'm planning on living on the royalties.

David Thompson: here's to the 50th title

David Thompson: i hope you live a long time, bill

Bill Crider: Me too.

Ray Banks: Oh, he will. If only to get all that lovely royalty money.

David Thompson: ;-)

Gerald So: what title are you up to now, Charles?

David Thompson: the biggest problem is distribution, which is what i'm contuing to work on

Charles Ardai: We've bought up to #38. A new Max Allan Collins called DEADLY BELOVED.

Duane Swierczynski: Wow. Excellent news.

Gerald So: ah, neat.

David Thompson: charles, do you ever see yourself doing 2 a month?

Jason Starr: terrific

Charles Ardai: Yeah -- we did 2/month when we started, but we also skipped months.

Gerald So: next q, anyone?

David Thompson: yeah, about DND, dammit. ;-)

Charles Ardai: We might go back to it. It's mostly a matter of my time. You know, the one-man operation thing.

Graham Powell: ?

Charles Ardai: DND: great anthology or the GREATEST anthology?

Duane Swierczynski: What's this "Hard Case" thing all the kids keep talking about? :)

Gerald So: Go ahead, Graham.

Jason Starr: Wait, this isn't the Megan Highsmith chat?

Gerald So: :)

Duane Swierczynski: DAMN NEAR LESBIAN

Charles Ardai: I think it's the Al Sporran chat.

Graham Powell: Where did you get your geezers from? Friends, relatives, or what?

Bill Crider: The Hard Case thing is kind of like a sporran.


Charles Ardai: A sporran is a sort of hard case, I guess.

Ray Banks: But it's hairy. Never forget the hairy aspect.

Bill Crider: My geezer is me, just with fewer teeth and a more colorful past.

Gerald So: wow.

Duane Swierczynski: Graham, my geezer was partly based on my grandfather. Everything is true, except the writing and sex part.

Charles Ardai: Where did I get my geezer from: Actually, I patterned my dying Mob boss on my grandmother. Go figure.

Ray Banks: I'm unashamed to say I made mine up - and I think it shows.

Graham Powell: What do you mean, Ray?

Ray Banks: Um, I was being self-effacing.

Gerald So: ah.

Bill Crider: Is that a first?

Ray Banks: Suck it up - it's rare.

Duane Swierczynski: Ray Banks is actually a senior. 77 years old, like his handle says. I saw him removing the makeup at B'Con last year. Paging Dorian Gray....

Sean Doolittle: Stop self-effacing, Banks. You'll go blind.

Ray Banks: But it feels so good

Charles Ardai: ?

Gerald So: Go ahead, Charles.

Charles Ardai: For Duane: Are there any authors you were hoping to get but who didn't make it in? (I'm thinking esp. of old timers.)

Duane Swierczynski: Yes.

Sean Doolittle: Tell us who all you rejected! Kidding.


Duane Swierczynski: I approached a bunch of my favorites who liked the idea, but were just too busy. I have to say though--nobody is an "also ran."

Ray Banks: Liar. I know for a fact you approached Stuart Woods.

Charles Ardai: I'm trying to think who the oldest living crime writers are. Possibly Donald Hamilton at 90 and Robert Terrall at 91. Can anyone think of anyone older?

Graham Powell: Richard Prather is in his 90s.

Charles Ardai: Not quite -- Prather's 85. I was just talking to him the other day.

David Thompson: yeah, who cares who didn't make it... duane amassed an amazing list

David Thompson: donald hamilton is alive?? and richard prather?? wow.

Bill Crider: You bet.

Duane Swierczynski: That's great.

Graham Powell: Oh, really? I was misinformed.

Charles Ardai: Yeah, Hamilton's alive and living in Sweden. Not in great health, alas.

Jason Starr: Spillane?

Duane Swierczynski: Actually, I did reject two stories. One I'll keep mum about. But the other is Dave White's first story. I don't think he'd mind saying why.

Ray Banks: Especially considering he's not here...

Duane Swierczynski: It was an excellent story. But the twist ending depended on the theme of the anthology. gave it away from the start.

Charles Ardai: Spillane was 88 when he died.

Ray Banks: ?

Charles Ardai: Once I thought about publishing an anthology whose theme was "Stories in which the bad guy gets away with his crime. No one wanted it. Couldn't figure out why.

Sean Doolittle: ha

Duane Swierczynski: That would have been awesome. Charles.

Jason Starr: I could contribute to that one.

Charles Ardai: Well, the idea's yours if you want to run with it

Gerald So: Go ahead, Ray.

Ray Banks: I'd like to ask Duane and David: how in the name of Almighty God did you two get together and decide to give this anthology business a try?

Duane Swierczynski: I'll let David respond first...


David Thompson: duane + david + alcohol = DAMN NEAR DEAD

Graham Powell: I heard that Demon Rum was involved.

David Thompson: or an evening we won't discuss

Duane Swierczynski: duane + david + alcohol + roofie = DAMN NEAR DEAD

Duane Swierczynski: Ken, Jason and Al were present, too, so they're part to blame. Dusty Rhoades, too.

David Thompson: seriously, duane and talked about the idea...and discovered we were both a little warped. i'd always thought the group of people with the MOST REASON for being fuckin' pissed are the elderly

Charles Ardai: Sequel: FETUS NOIR: DAMN NEAR BORN

Gerald So: lol.

Duane Swierczynski: And see, I though David asked me to edit this because of "Hilly Palmer's Last Case," a story I wrote about an aging P.I. I learned a few months ago that David had never heard of it.

Duane Swierczynski: (FETUS NOIR would be super.)

Duane Swierczynski: "The Last Good Trimester" by James Crumley

Graham Powell: "To Helen's Back Labor".

Gerald So: Who says titles are difficult?

David Thompson: ?


Ray Banks: My Dark Placentas.

Duane Swierczynski: Ah!

Gerald So: Go ahead, David.

David Thompson: actually, a remark first. what amazed me most was how inventive everyone was with their stories...and fairly dissimilar, and McKenna & I were astonished whenever duane would send another story on, and it'd be better than the one before...jason's, therefore, was first ;-)

David Thompson: so, congrats to duane for doing a great job

David Thompson: okay, wait, i didn't have a question after all

Duane Swierczynski: I wish I could take credit, but it's all about the contributors.

Ray Banks: Of which you were one, Duane

Duane Swierczynski: Except me, Ray. Except me. Besides, Thompson was my editor on that one, so blame him.

Charles Ardai: Indeed, congrats. Editing anthologies is tough, thankless work. Kudos to he who takes it on and produces something good when the smoke clears.

David Thompson: well, you busted your butt to get everyone excited about the idea

Ray Banks: I didn't need to get excited. I just needed to be asked. I'm a hoor.

David Thompson: funny story about duane's. he was running behind, was considering NOT contributing a story. Thought that writing the intro would be good enough. We had to convince him to do it, and he powered that sucker out in a couple days. What an idiot.

Bill Crider: The boy's a genius.

Duane Swierczynski: I work best under deadlines. What can I say?

Ray Banks: Easily bullied.

Bill Crider: ?

David Thompson: hey, mckenna's joined us

Sean Doolittle: He's a big puppy, Swierczynski

Ray Banks: He kills puppies. Just by patting them.

Duane Swierczynski: *Looking* at them, Ray.

Gerald So: Go ahead, Bill.

Bill Crider: Charles, back to the living old guys. Any chance of a Hard Case book by Prather or Hamilton?

Charles Ardai: We have a Prather coming in December.

Bill Crider: Great.

Charles Ardai: One of his rare non-Shell Scotts, called THE PEDDLER.

Gerald So: There was one by Hamilton. Night Walker.

Bill Crider: Yeah, I guess I meant NEW book by either of them.

Charles Ardai: Both Prather and Hamilton have last, unpublished books they've been working on forever. But I haven't read them, so I can't say how publishable they are...

Jason Starr: I'll finish them for them :)

Bill Crider: When you're older, it's more difficult to do everything. Both those guys are heroes of mine.

Graham Powell: Me, too.

Gerald So: Next q?

Duane Swierczynski: I went through a few months reading all of the Matt Helm books. Superb. They're so underrated--especially the early books.

Jason Starr: I love their stuff too. Seriously, hope you get their new ones.

Charles Ardai: Thanks. We'll see.

Sean Doolittle: Duane, how difficult was it to edit an antho on top of working the day job and writing THE BLONDE?

Ray Banks: Which is an EXCELLENT novel.

Duane Swierczynski: I'll best honest: David had it right earlier. I'm an idiot. I should known better than to try to 1.) do the day job 2.) write a novel 3.) edit an anthology and 4.) tour for the previous novel at the same time, but I'm like Ray: a total hoor. I have a hard time saying no. Especially to good ideas (like DND)

David Thompson: and duane and i have MORE great ideas

Gerald So: ooh, foreshadowing.

Bill Crider: Send a body double for the tour. Matt Damon, maybe.

Duane Swierczynski: I'd need two Matt Damons for my pudgy body

Duane Swierczynski: What's good is, a lot of the work was done in pieces, not all at once until the end

Ray Banks: ?

Sean Doolittle: And yet you were the one giving ME work beers in Birmingham, Alabama. That's a samaritan right there, friends.

Duane Swierczynski: My pleasure, Sean. I'll always give a brotha a Yuengling.

Graham Powell: Too much information, Duane.

Duane Swierczynski: :)

Gerald So: Go ahead, Ray.

Jason Starr: I just edited an anthology myself which is just out.....BLOODLINES...and I have to say it's a shit load of work to do an anthology...and I think it may have even been harder for me (us) because we had to do contracts and negotiate with agents as well.

Ray Banks: Q for Thompson - what great ideas do you and Duane have? Anything non-sexual?

David Thompson: duane and i need to talk more at b'con... more alcohol

Duane Swierczynski: I just picked up BLOODLINES. I can't wait, even though I know dick about horse racing.

David Thompson: jason, BLOODLINES looks fantastic!! mckenna's here and she agrees ;-)

Duane Swierczynski: Jason assembled an incredible roster.

David Thompson: the guy's a genius

Sean Doolittle: Jason's book looks awesome.

Jason Starr: Thanks....we think it came out pretty cool. It's really only about 1/3 crime/noir...Lee Child wrote a great story to start it off....and there's a novella by Joe Lansdale that is wonderful

Sean Doolittle: Big Lansdale fan here. . ..

Duane Swierczynski: Same here.

Graham Powell: Yeah, he rocks.

Bill Crider: Lansdale's is about mule racing, right?

Jason Starr: Yes, mule racing at the turn of the century....Woodrell and Scott Phillips. Also some turf writers like Bill Nack and Laura Hillebrand etc...

Ray Banks: And Woodrell's in it...

David Thompson: wait, is ken bruen in it? i hear he writes short stories, too

Gerald So: How did you determine how many stories to finally include, Duane and David?

Duane Swierczynski: Great question. It was hard to say no. I think we planned... what, 20 stories? Ended up with 27.

David Thompson: i think we just took stories until we had to wrap it up. i think duane expected more people to say no.

Duane Swierczynski: Of course.

Bill Crider: And when they didn't, he felt obligated.

Duane Swierczynski: Or, more people to say yes, but back out later (understandably)

Duane Swierczynski: Hah, Bill.

Charles Ardai: It feels like a good sized book. 20-30 stories is fairly normal for an anthology.

Bill Crider: Good thing David had plenty of dough to pay everyone.

Charles Ardai: I did one with 50 stories once, many from dead authors, and it was a nightmare.

Duane Swierczynski: There's that bank in Houston David doesn't like to talk about.

Graham Powell: What was that one, Charles?

Duane Swierczynski: Was it a rights nightmare, Charles?

Charles Ardai: It was the 50th Anniversary collection for Ellery Queen's Mystery Magazine, and yes, the rights were a nightmare. Eleanor Sullivan chose the stories, and they were reprints, so that side of it was fine. Just the rights that gave me ulcers. But that was when I was 21 and could take the punishment.

David Thompson: last year, right, charles?

Jason Starr: It taught you a lot about rights though, I'm sure

Charles Ardai: Yep. I'm hitting the big two-two this year.

Duane Swierczynski: We got the stories in the wrong order, David!

Sean Doolittle: You don't look a day over 19, Charles.

Graham Powell: ?

Charles Ardai: I think you meant 91.

Jason Starr: You look like shit for 22

Gerald So: Go ahead, Graham.

Graham Powell: Question for David and Duane - I have the book open here in front of me, and why are there no pages numbers in the table of contents?

Duane Swierczynski: Cost too much money.

David Thompson: that's my fault... leave duane out of it. we completely overlooked it!

Duane Swierczynski: I wanted a larger cut and I ordered Thompson to kill his fancy page numbers.

David Thompson: and then i noticed reed didn't do it in HARD-BOILED BROOKLYN

Charles Ardai: Copycat.

Bill Crider: I think the no page numbers deal was very avant-garde.

David Thompson: so i figured he set a standard for mediocrity and i set my sights for that

Graham Powell: I did read an anthology once that had NO table of contents.

Duane Swierczynski: : )

David Thompson: uh, yeah, i meant avant-garde

Charles Ardai: I'd like to do an anthology once that had no page numbers, no ToC, and no stories. Just blank pages.

Duane Swierczynski: ANTI NOIR

Charles Ardai: It would be like a John Cage composition. NO NOIR

Bill Crider: I want to contribute.

Graham Powell: Yeah, if that's not Punk Rock, I don't know what is.

David Thompson: mckenna says congrats for the john cage comment!!!

Sean Doolittle: I'm going to submit a story right here and now:

Charles Ardai: I met John Cage once. He didn't say much.

Duane Swierczynski: Ken just submitted his

Graham Powell: I already finished mine: " ."

Ray Banks: That's fantastic

Duane Swierczynski: ...........................................

David Thompson: :))

Ray Banks: A tour de force

Sean Doolittle: That laughy mouth is scaring me

Jason Starr: Anybody know what the latest on FUCK NOIR is?

David Thompson: jennifer submitted it to me, and i told her i just can't do it yet

David Thompson: :))

Sarah Weinman entered the room.

Jason Starr: I told Ken recently that I loved a recent story of his.....he said, I wish I remember writing it.

Ray Banks: Weinman.

Gerald So: Here's Sarah.

Charles Ardai: Hey, Sarah. So how was the bear?

Bill Crider: Hi, Sarah

Sarah Weinman: finally, free from the shackles of Brooklyn!

Duane Swierczynski: Sarah!

Sarah Weinman: :-)

David Thompson: mckenna and david say hi, sarah

Ray Banks: The bear? Is there something we should know about?

Sean Doolittle: Hey Sara!

Ray Banks: You rasslin' grizzlies now?

Charles Ardai: Yes. But I'll let Jason explain. He's better at exegesis than I am.

Bill Crider: Exegesis? That lowered the level.

Duane Swierczynski: Paws for concern.

Ray Banks: Why the big paws?

Ray Banks: Badum-bum tssshhh.

Sarah Weinman: I'd like to know too...

Charles Ardai: [JEOPARDY music plays.]

Jason Starr: Hey sarah, how was shopping at THE MAUL?

David Thompson: you capitalize words, punctuate sentence, AND use big words... you should be banned from yahoo.

Duane Swierczynski: Did you buy a POLAR fleece?

Sarah Weinman: why do I get the feeling I should have had more caffeine

Ray Banks: Because you're sleepy?

Sarah Weinman: too obvious

Ray Banks: You need to hibernate?

Bill Crider: We're allowed caffiene?

Duane Swierczynski: Nice 'un, Ray.

Gerald So: question, anyone? :)

Ray Banks: Secretly, I'm still firin' 'em out.

Charles Ardai: For Sarah: Any cool happenings at the Fest? Any fisticuffs break out?

Jason Starr: was the fest un-bear-able?

Duane Swierczynski: ?

Gerald So: Go ahead, Duane.

Duane Swierczynski: Sarah, we all shared our least favorite DND story. Which did you like the least?

Gerald So: Duane lies.

Ray Banks: :|

Duane Swierczynski: [-(

Bill Crider: ?

Sarah Weinman: well it was great to have books and food in the same space (Farmer's Market in Borough Hall)

Jason Starr: Lot of signing?

Sarah Weinman: kind of

Duane Swierczynski: Did Sara Gran make it?

Jason Starr: by the way...I'm Jason, Sarah

Sarah Weinman: hey, I knew that, that's your handle on RARA-Avis right?

Gerald So: Go ahead, Bill.

Bill Crider: So besides Duane and KEN BRUEN does anybody else knock out a short story in a day or so? Or does it take longer?

Ray Banks: I honestly don't remember - probably took about three days or summat.

Jason Starr: Oh, right....It takes me forever, Bill. I don't know how Ken does it. Actually, I do know how he does it...he doesn't stop writing...there's no pausing to, you know, think...It's just straight ahead writing.

Bill Crider: Takes me forever, too. I've written novels in less time.

Duane Swierczynski: I may have written it quick, but the idea took a long time.

Sarah Weinman: I wrote the first draft of "Out of Clay" (TD story) in a day, all 5500 words of it.

Gerald So: why does it drag out for you, do you think?

Bill Crider: It's tough to get a short story right because of the space. In a novel, you can make mistakes.

Duane Swierczynski: Good point, Bill.

Jason Starr: I find it, in general, very hard to write to a subject.
Damn Near Dead was easier in that respect.

Bill Crider: Just the opposite with me, Jason. I love to write to a subject.

Sarah Weinman: but it's also easier to keep an entire short story in your head,
so that when you do sit down to write it, there it is. In theory.

Charles Ardai: Larry Block often turns his short stories out in a day. And of course a lot of the pulp writers did.

Sarah Weinman: they had to

Charles Ardai: Right.

Jason Starr: It's not that I don't like it....I just find it harder to come up with ideas.

Sean Doolittle: Me too, Jason.

Ray Banks: Plus, you know it has to be good when you find out who the other contributors are.

Ray Banks: That kills me.

Sarah Weinman: peer pressure.

Bill Crider: I asked Marty Greenberg about writing to a subject. He said some writers don't like it, while others kind of need it.

Sarah Weinman: it's like deadlines.

Jason Starr: Speaking of Ken--he's amazing at [the short story]. It comes naturally for him. Not me.

Bill Crider: Me, neither.

Charles Ardai: The better I know a subject, the harder it is for me to write to. I've worked on or near Wall Street for years, and Wall Street Noir drove me nuts. But ask me to write a story about Tibetan unicyclists, and I can knock that baby out in a day.

Jason Starr: Interesting, Charles.

Sarah Weinman: next up: TIBETAN UNICYCLIST NOIR

Duane Swierczynski: ROAD MONKS

Ray Banks: About the sound of one wheel spinning...

Duane Swierczynski: "I was at one with the universe when this dame walked in..."

Sean Doolittle: Good one.

Sean Doolittle: Sarah, your Galleycat pard Ron is here in Omaha covering the downtown Omaha lit fest while you're covering Brooklyn. Who got the better deal?

Sarah Weinman: I vote for Ron :-)

Graham Powell: Wait - Omaha lit fest?

Sean Doolittle: Exactly, Graham. Exactly. (actually, it's a hell of an effort)

Sarah Weinman: actually at one point I got to use someone's video camera to shoot footage so I decided to get one of the farmer's market people on camera. "So, what does Brooklyn being the literary capital mean to you?" "NOTHING"

David Thompson: ?

Gerald So: Go ahead, David.

David Thompson: question for everyone: just curious, has anyone gotten e-mail or in-person feedback about their DND stories? i'd love to know it's getting out there and being read and enjoyed.

Bill Crider: A couple of people at ConMisterio mentioned my story to me. I think the book was a big hit there.

Aldo Calcagno: Hey, I'm late to the party

Sarah Weinman: maybe from a couple of people, that's about it so far

Gerald So: Hi, Aldo.

Duane Swierczynski: El Jefe!

Bill Crider: Hi, Aldo.

Charles Ardai: I rarely get feedback about short stories, unless someone objects to something I wrote.

Sarah Weinman: Aldo!

Aldo Calcagno: Hi All

Charles Ardai: Like "People in Brazil don't speak Spanish"

Jason Starr: Hey Aldo

Ray Banks: Ola, El Jefe. I got the head you ordered.

Jason Starr: Jason here

Charles Ardai: Or "August in Brazil is winter, not summer."

Sarah Weinman: or "A Glock doesn't have a safety"

Duane Swierczynski: "TIbetans don't unicycle."

Charles Ardai: Now that's just not true.

Sarah Weinman: it is if they are vampires

Ray Banks: "Cats don't have antlers..." Pfft.

Graham Powell: "Duane is not a Polish name."

Sarah Weinman: that's something else I learned today

Duane Swierczynski: I keep telling people, I'm black.

Bill Crider: Have you guys heard of The Bradbury Defense? Bradbury said that some kid told him about a mistake in one of his Martian stories. "So I hit him."

Ray Banks: That's the way to do it.

Duane Swierczynski: That's awesome.

Charles Ardai: It was probably Harlan Ellison.

Sean Doolittle: ha

Graham Powell: Another satisfied customer.

Ray Banks: I might just do that as a pre-emptive move.

Sarah Weinman: oy, Harlan...

Duane Swierczynski: Harlan would have grabbed Ray's tit.

Ray Banks: And I would have let him.

Bill Crider: I think Harlan prefers women.

Ray Banks: I think he'd change his mind once he grabbed me.

Ray Banks: Christ, why did I type that?

Bill Crider: And who wouldn't.

Duane Swierczynski: And a chat legend is born.

Graham Powell: And tomorrow, it will be posted on Chatterrific.

Sarah Weinman: for all the world to see

Bill Crider: As Freud said, Ray, there are no mistakes.

Aldo Calcagno: lol Bill

Graham Powell: Having read Ray's stories, I'd say that's crap.

Ray Banks: And sometimes a cigar is just a great big dick.

Bill Crider: Did he say that, too?

Ray Banks: Freud was scared of ferns. I don't take advice from that kind of fellow.

Bill Crider: I thought that was Monica somebody or other.

Graham Powell: Knock off the "Transporter" jokes, Sean's back.

Charles Ardai: How do people keep getting dropped by accident?

Sean Doolittle: Sorry folks. Harlan Ellison called.

Gerald So: i think it's the number of people in the room. this is the most in a while.

Graham Powell: Who says it's by accident?

Sarah Weinman: there are spies...everywhere...lurking...

Bill Crider: . . . there are no accidents, Freud said.

Jason Starr: I haven't been kicked off yet...maybe Yahoo moderator is a Buddhist? Kicked Duane's ass out

Duane Swierczynski: The gods hate me.

Ray Banks: The GOD, you heathen.

Graham Powell: What I did, I pressed Escape when I wanted to kill something I was typing. And it closed the conference.

Charles Ardai: I think it's racist, Duane. Yahoo doesn't care about black people.

Duane Swierczynski: Damn straight yo.

Gerald So: no, the chatroom is buggy, like most chatrooms.

Graham Powell: The Dogs hate you too.

Jason Starr: There is only the self.

Sarah Weinman: that's assuming we believe in the self

Sean Doolittle: Good one charles

Jason Starr: who is asking that question?

Sarah Weinman: perhaps we are all figments of no one's imagination

Gerald So: go ahead, anyone.

Duane Swierczynski: We're all characters in an Emerson LaSalle novel.

Jason Starr: Who wonders this?

Charles Ardai: Funny how you can get a contact high in a chatroom.

Sarah Weinman: damn straight

Sean Doolittle: I heard LaSalle was in poor health. Anybody know?

Sarah Weinman: as for Emerson, he has to get on YouTube

Duane Swierczynski: I heard he has rickets.

Aldo Calcagno: When was the last time we were all here at the same time? Where's Paul (Dave)?

Graham Powell: He smells of whelks.

Bill Crider: Send him a lemon.

Sean Doolittle: I thought it was ferrets. You're probably right.

Ray Banks: I heard he has scrofula and a dose of the shivering heeby-jeebies.

Gerald So: question?

Aldo Calcagno: ?

Gerald So: Saved by Aldo.

Aldo Calcagno: Where's Dave? Did all you old geezers kill him off or something?

Duane Swierczynski: Dave has a date.

Sarah Weinman: He was otherwise engaged

Gerald So: that's your question?

Ray Banks: Dave doesn't like to hang out with us now he has a girlfriend and a book deal.

Duane Swierczynski: Um... yeah, what Sarah said

Sarah Weinman: well that was the same thing, but I don't know if Dave wanted his date immortalized on the Internet

Aldo Calcagno: No excuse....

Sarah Weinman: then again, maybe he does.

Jason Starr: I guess that "Hi, I'm a writer" line works better than it used to

Aldo Calcagno: Hi, I'm reader doesn't work either

Graham Powell: I hear, "Hi, I'm a middle-school English teacher" works better.

Duane Swierczynski: "Hi, I'm Ken Bruen" works.

Gerald So: :)

Bill Crider: Or, "Hi, I'm KEN BRUEN."

Graham Powell: Bill beat me to the punch.

Sarah Weinman: ha!

Duane Swierczynski: (Ken is going to bitch slap us when he reads this later.)

Ray Banks: I intend to duck.

Bill Crider: Ken has time to read?

Jason Starr: When the next question is " Really? What company do you work for?" you know you're fooked.

Graham Powell: I think we need to start the Bad Bruen contest.

Sarah Weinman: Ken reads like a book a day

Aldo Calcagno: ?

Gerald So: go, aldo.

Jason Starr: Hi I'm Ken Bruen doesn't even work for Ken Bruen

Aldo Calcagno: Duane, is there a volume 2 in store?

Duane Swierczynski: David? :)


Gerald So: Damn Near Reincarnation.


David Thompson: i loved duane's subtitle

Graham Powell: DEADER THAN EVER.

Charles Ardai: Or just: DEAD.


Aldo Calcagno: Hey, Harry says you can die twice....

Sarah Weinman: Damn Near Undead?


Duane Swierczynski: Yep.

Gerald So: vamp noir, Sarah?

Sarah Weinman: hey, horror's coming back...

Duane Swierczynski: DAMN NEAR UNDEAD would be cool. Zombie noir.

David Thompson: megan abbott's editing the next BFP anthology

Ray Banks: Cool. Means I can write that zombie novel.

Ray Banks: I want in DAMN NEAR UNDEAD.


Charles Ardai: Yeah, but only girls get to submit stories.

Ray Banks: I want IN IT.

Charles Ardai: Guys get to submit, too.

Charles Ardai: Just not stories.

Jason Starr: Before I forget, Ken and I put a big DAMN NEAR DEAD reference in Slide....I mean, unless Charles cuts it.

Sarah Weinman: Megan's anthology is going to be awesome

David Thompson: seriously, jason?? that's awesome

Duane Swierczynski: I can't wait

David Thompson: sarah'll have a story in HELL OF A WOMAN

Jason Starr: yes, seriously

Sarah Weinman: I have to write it first :-)

David Thompson: megan's also lined up some others

David Thompson: like laura lippman. sara gran hopes to do one. sandra scoppetone.

Duane Swierczynski: Sara Gran would be genius.

Charles Ardai: I think she should get a story from Patricia Highsmith. I hear she turns 'em out in a day.

David Thompson: vicki hendricks

Ray Banks: Sara Gran IS genius.

Bill Crider: Wait. I thought Megan WAS Patricia Highsmith.

Charles Ardai: In a skirt.

Graham Powell: Reincarnated.

Jason Starr: And she kind of looks like Dennis Lehane in a skirt

Graham Powell: Only shorter.

Ray Banks: I thought I was Lehane in a skirt.

Duane Swierczynski: Looks like it's a running theme to have a cuss word in a Busted Flush anthology.

Sarah Weinman: and she can outdrink all of us

Duane Swierczynski: Which means you have to do FUCK NOIR.

David Thompson: that's why i want to do, jennifer's antho!

David Thompson: F*CKED

David Thompson: but it isn't fair to her to ask her to wait until 2008

Duane Swierczynski: Careful, though. By the time you publish your 14th anthology, it'll be something like DOODYHEAD NOIR

Jason Starr: Maybe that's how DAVE WHITE got his date....went to, saw the listing for a girl who looks like LEHANE IN A SKIRT BUT SHORTER...and thought, I'm there

Ray Banks: Dave White gets his dates the same way the rest of us do - a stopwatch, a rag and a vial of chloroform...

Sarah Weinman: As long as it's not Plushies and Furries Noir

Duane Swierczynski: Even us married folk, Ray.

Ray Banks: Especially us married folk, Duane.

Duane Swierczynski: :)

Charles Ardai: Funny -- I was just talking with a film producer who wants to do a documentary on plushies and furries.

Gerald So: really?

David Thompson: um, what are plushies and furries?

Charles Ardai: 1) Yes

David Thompson: am i totally out of it?

Sarah Weinman: David, google it

Sean Doolittle: plushies are like haggis only smooth

Charles Ardai: 2) People who dress up in animal costumes for erotic thrills.

Duane Swierczynski: You're so sweet, David. Innocent.

Sarah Weinman: it's refreshing

Graham Powell: We'll fix that.

Charles Ardai: Costumes like...bears.

Ray Banks: What Sean said. But swinging on a rope.

David Thompson: hey, has anyone read Max Kinnings??

Charles Ardai: Just as an example.

David Thompson: he wrote HITMAN

David Thompson: THE FIXER

Sarah Weinman: I remember when those books came out, but never read 'em.

David Thompson: he wrote a third book, asked me to read it, and it was brilliant... but all about different forms of eroticism, including the plushie/furrie thing... i'd forgotten

David Thompson: they're great

Gerald So: any questions, Sarah?

David Thompson: especially HITMAN

Graham Powell: ?

Duane Swierczynski: Was it called FUZZ?

Gerald So: Go ahead, Graham.

Ray Banks: FURBALL

Graham Powell: David, what's the next book for Busted Flush?

David Thompson: glad you asked!! STONE CITY, by Mitchell Smith

Bill Crider: A classic.

David Thompson: one of the best noir novels EVER WRITTEN

Duane Swierczynski: I loved it.

Aldo Calcagno: Can't wait.....

Ray Banks: I haven't read it as yet.

Sean Doolittle: that'll be a good one

Gerald So: ?

David Thompson: originally published in 1990

Sarah Weinman: absolutely

David Thompson: from simon & schuster

Jason Starr: Better than MONKS ON UNICYCLES?

Sarah Weinman: ?

Duane Swierczynski: the ultimate prison novel

Gerald So: How would each of you define "noir"?

Gerald So: Your q next, Sarah.

Ray Banks: I'll nick Eddie Muller's: "An empathetic dive into an existential darkness."

Bill Crider: I'm into the rara-avis definition; Screwed.

Graham Powell: Jack Bludis's defintion.

Bill Crider: Right.

Sarah Weinman: instead of order out of chaos, it's chaos out of order.

Charles Ardai: "Noir" is the fiction of despair and the circumstances that induce despair.

Charles Ardai: Or something like that.

Duane Swierczynski: I'm with Bill on that one. Haardboiled = tough; noir = screwed

David Thompson: SCREWED, another BFP title

Duane Swierczynski: Or, as Al Guthrie once said, "The crucifixion was noir; the resurrection, hardboiled."

Ray Banks: If you're to believe a person I shared a panel with once, it's the search for a homeless man's monkey.

Graham Powell: You're channeling Rickards.

Graham Powell: A writer at the Ausin B'Con (forgot who) said, "Noir is all about frustration."

Jason Starr: The thing is only people in mystery community seem to understand these difference....90 percent of book buying public has no idea what it means.

Bill Crider: I like the monkey definition a lot.

Sarah Weinman: that's why everything's defined as a "thriller" these days anyway

Duane Swierczynski: Very true.

Gerald So: Go ahead with your question, Sarah.

Jason Starr: I like Al's description....thriller certainly means more to book buyers, IMHO

Sarah Weinman: For the short story that ranks among your absolute favorites and why

Bill Crider: What we need is a new organization Noir Writers of America. NWA.

Duane Swierczynski: They'd be too depressed to send out newsletters.

Charles Ardai: NWA. I love it.

Sean Doolittle: nice, bill

Sarah Weinman: wasn't that a rap group in the late 80s

Charles Ardai: Pronounced "Nwah," of course.

Jason Starr: or Noir Writing Assholes

Charles Ardai: Favorite short stories: "Collecting Ackermans" and "Out the Window" by Lawrence Block. Batch of short-shorts by Fred Brown. "The Day of the Bullet" by Stanley Ellin.

Bill Crider: Sorry, folks, but my favorite story is SF. "Desertion" by Clifford Simak. Best. Ending. Ever.

Graham Powell: An obscure favorite: "Undertaker, Please Drive Slow" by Ron Goulart. And Fred Brown, too.

Ray Banks: "Homeless" by Andrew Vachss. VERY short. First one I ever read that felt absolutely perfect in every conceivable way. Not a word wasted.

Duane Swierczynski: Oooh... with you there on the Fred Brown.

Charles Ardai: *Anything* by Stanley Ellin, actually.

Duane Swierczynski: "The Pit" by Joe Lansdale

Sarah Weinman: and ooh, thanks for reminding me about Stanley Ellin

Graham Powell: "The Pit" is just harsh.

Aldo Calcagno: ?

Gerald So: "Fat" by Raymond Carver is one of my faves because there is no fat on it as a story.

Graham Powell: Also from the Black Lizard anthology, "Death And The Dancing Shadows", by James Reasoner.

Aldo Calcagno: What is everyone working on at the moment?

Gerald So: I also like "Araby" by Joyce and "Wants" by Grace Paley.

Ray Banks: "A Good Man Is Hard To Find" is another one...I do like that.

Duane Swierczynski: There's a George Garrett story that I LOVED. Can't remember the damn title...

Sean Doolittle: What was Hemingway's famous one-line story? For Sale, Baby shoes, never used? That' pretty noir.

Bill Crider: Flannery O'Connor is great. Nearly every story.

Duane Swierczynski: Absolutely diabolical.

Sarah Weinman: oh god yeah

Ray Banks: And she was a woman - take THAT, Sandra Scoppetone!

Bill Crider: Aldo, I have a novel due to St. Martin's in November. I should be working on it right now. But this is more fun.

Duane Swierczynski: Aldo, I have a novel due to St. Martin's in October. I'm trying to finish before B'Con. (Take that, Bill!)

Gerald So: I'm working on poems. Slightly voluntarily. :)

Charles Ardai: I have to finish the sequel to LITTLE GIRL LOST. The deadline, she is looming.

Sarah Weinman: I want to finish a first draft before BCon. Will this happen? Ha

Ray Banks: I have to re-write the last chapter of the third Innes by the end of the year, but I'm also working on something else.

Graham Powell: I'm working on a couple of stories, destined (I hope) for THRILLING DETECTIVE and HARDLUCK STORIES.

Gerald So: I'd be glad to read it, Graham.

Sean Doolittle: perpetually behind deadline on a new novel

Bill Crider: "Something else." Vague and mysterious.

Duane Swierczynski: (I'm sending beers your way, Sean.)

David Thompson: ray, when does that come out?

Graham Powell: When is SATURDAY'S CHILD out in the US.

Ray Banks: I am extremely vague.

Jason Starr: I'm working on SLIDE...a new novel....and about to start a graphic novel for DC COMICS

Ray Banks: Third Innes should be out next Sept, I think.

Ray Banks: Second Innes out next May.

Duane Swierczynski: That's awesome, Jason!

Duane Swierczynski: I love me the funny books.

Ray Banks: Aw man, I am so jealous.

Sarah Weinman: ?

Duane Swierczynski: A new series, or are you jumping in with a series character?

Gerald So: go ahead, Sarah,

Jason Starr: It's an original that Ken and I are doing

Duane Swierczynski: Brilliant.

Jason Starr: A supernatural thriller

Sarah Weinman: Well since Aldo asked the writing question, I'll do the same for reading - what was the last book you finished reading?


Duane Swierczynski: Just read CARTE BLANCHE by Carlo Lucarelli.

Sean Doolittle: it's been all manuscripts here lately

Charles Ardai: IT'S SUPERMAN by Tom DeHaven. Fun, though not quite as good as it might have been.

Jason Starr: original...standalone, not a series

Gerald So: KILL ALL THE LAWYERS by Paul Levine.

Ray Banks: THE ZERO, Jess Walter

Sarah Weinman: really, Charles? I'd heard good things about it

Charles Ardai: It's good. It's just not spectacular. He spends too much of his time on his own invented character when we want to read about Supes, and Lois, and Lex.

Graham Powell: Just got THE NIGHT GARDENER by Pelecanos today.

Jason Starr: I'm reading Steve Hamilton's new novel...A Stolen Season.....Great so far

Sarah Weinman: I just finished THE EXQUISITE by Laird Hunt and the ARC of Jeff Parker's new book

David Thompson: Bob Cook's DISORDERLY ELEMENTS, reprinted by Felony & Mayhem

Charles Ardai: Am reading Charlie Stella's latest; only a few chapters in, but they're excellent chapters.

Duane Swierczynski: I'm about to start WORLD WAR Z, by Max Brooks.

David Thompson: Mckenna finished L. A. REX

Gerald So: is that Shakedown, Charles?

Charles Ardai: Yep.

Sarah Weinman: oooooh I so want to read that, Duane

Duane Swierczynski: I can't resist the zombies.

Jason Starr: By the way, I am reading from my new novel LIGHTS OUT with Steve Hamilton this Tuesday at 6:30 at Colliseum Books in NYC

Gerald So: Sean is having difficulties getting back into the room.

Bill Crider: I'm reading CAPTAIN ALATRISTE. I seem to be into Spanish novels lately.

Duane Swierczynski: Somebody finally carded him.

Jason Starr: Shakedown looks great

Sarah Weinman: Duane what did you think of CARTE BLANCHE

Duane Swierczynski: I liked it. Not usually my thing--historical noir. But it was well done. Plus, at 108 pages, you can't beat it.

Sarah Weinman: yeah I did too but his later stuff (ALMOST BLUE and DAY AFTER DAY) were more to my liking. And also short.

Bill Crider: 108 pages? Sounds like KEN BRUEN novel.

Gerald So: or a Cole Ford.

Duane Swierczynski: (Gold Star to Gerald!)

Ray Banks: Short is good.

Duane Swierczynski: Short rules.

Ray Banks: Unless you need to reach a light switch.

Sean Doolittle: Don't know if you'll see this folks--I think I've been barred at the door. Hope to see at least most of you in Madison. . . .

Duane Swierczynski: See you, Sean.

Sean Doolittle left the room.

Bill Crider: Who's going to B'con?

Sarah Weinman: moi

Jason Starr: I'll be there

Charles Ardai: I am not, alas. I'm all con-ned out.

Ray Banks: Nup.

Graham Powell: Not I.

Duane Swierczynski: I'll be there.

Bill Crider: Me too

Ray Banks: I can only manage every other year.

David Thompson: i'll be there! and mckenna will be with me in spirit.

Graham Powell: Is Baltimore next year?

Bill Crider: Wait till the big royalties start rolling in, Ray.

Charles Ardai: Next year, when it's in Alaska (which I assume most people won't got to) I'm thinking of holding an alternate Bouchercon here in New York.

Duane Swierczynski: TIS ALASKA......................

Sarah Weinman: ah, Alaska.

Graham Powell: I have to say - what the hell were they thinking?

Sarah Weinman: Well everything else is in NYC next year

David Thompson: mckenna and i are both hitting alaska

Ray Banks: Big royalties. Yeah. Uh-huh.

Sarah Weinman: Comic con, BEA, Thrillerfest

Charles Ardai: I mean, we wouldn't call it Bouchercon, but it would be a place for people to gather if they're not inclined to go to Alaska.

Jason Starr: what? no mckenna? say it ain't so?

Graham Powell: Whoops, I guess SOMEbody's going.

Bill Crider: And the Alaskans volunteered to have the con. That's the important thing.

Sarah Weinman: exactly

Ray Banks: How often am I likely to go to Alaska for a reason? I'll be there. Nice and cold.

David Thompson: jason, mckenna hopes to do new york the week after

Jason Starr: Great, maybe I'll see her here.

Charles Ardai: Ah, the Alaskans. I wonder if they unicycle there.

Sarah Weinman: the bigger question is whether anyone's bidding for 2009

Duane Swierczynski: Budapest.

Ray Banks: 2009 is at my house.

Charles Ardai: Really?

Ray Banks: Yes, really.

Sarah Weinman: no. Prague.

Bill Crider: The Tibetan Alaskans unicycle, I hear.

Charles Ardai: I'd go if it were in Budapest. All my relatives are there.

David Thompson: maybe houston, someday

Graham Powell: Shreveport, Louisiana.

Ray Banks: Houston would be good.

Duane Swierczynski: Philly would be cool.

Charles Ardai: Philly would be. Any word on Goodiscon?

Jason Starr: Left Coast Helsinki

Bill Crider: So volunteer. They've done Philly twice.

Duane Swierczynski: Bill, I'd love to. But I can't balance a checkbook, let alone help run a con.

David Thompson: mckenna and i MIGHT go to goodiscon, duane

Duane Swierczynski: It's still happening. Should be a blast.

Charles Ardai: Good. I'm looking forward to the boxing match.

Duane Swierczynski: THAT will be fantastic.

Charles Ardai: Unless I'm drafted to fight in it.

Sarah Weinman: ha!

Duane Swierczynski: It's you Vs. Starr.

Charles Ardai: Is hair pulling allowed?

Duane Swierczynski: Of course

Graham Powell: Sean would have an advantage.

Charles Ardai: Folks, I see it's 8:35, which is a geezer's proper bedtime. So...I'm going to sign off.

Bill Crider: Nighty night.

David Thompson: take care, charles

Duane Swierczynski: Take care, Charles,

Ray Banks: Really, it's 1:35 over here.

Gerald So: Thanks for attending, Charles.

Ray Banks: Nighty, Charles

Jason Starr: Wait, Duane, great line for my COZY on our panel at B-con...skinning the cat

Charles Ardai: Gracias, all. Glad to be a part of the fun...

Duane Swierczynski: nice!

David Thompson: if pete hamill goes out on tour, tell him to get down to houston

Sarah Weinman: bye Charles

Jason Starr: I must run me own self...been a blast

Duane Swierczynski: I'd better go, too.

Gerald So: Thanks, Jason and Duane.

Ray Banks: Well, it's not going to shave itself...

Bill Crider: Toodles, guys.

Duane Swierczynski: (Our goal: to leave Ray with the check.)

Sarah Weinman: yeah same here

David Thompson: thanks, gerald, for putting this together

Ray Banks: Hey, not AGAIN.

Sarah Weinman: it was great fun

Duane Swierczynski: This was a blast.

Gerald So: My pleasure, David.

Jason Starr: as McKenna would say........Se y'all soon

Ray Banks: Who had the tiramasu?

Duane Swierczynski: Hah!

David Thompson: lol

Bill Crider: Just don't let Harlan Ellison see the transcript.

Ray Banks: Or grab my titty.

Jason Starr: or Dennis Lehane

David Thompson: hey, everyone, look for me at b'con to help sign/sell books!

Duane Swierczynski: Seacrest.... out.

David Thompson: i should have books at various booths

Bill Crider: I'm out guys. Thanks, Gerald and all.

Ray Banks: And I should probably go myself. It is rather late-early. A lovely time was had by all.

Gerald So: Thanks again for staying up, Ray.

David Thompson: night, everyone... take care!! from david and mckenna

Ray Banks: Ta-ta folks!

Graham Powell: I better go, too. The wife has dinner ready. If I'm five minutes late, I lose a finger.

Gerald So: all right, Graham. Thanks.

Graham Powell: See ya later.


Dave White said…
Ah, I love being immortalized on the internet.

I did not have a date.

Unless you consider my mom's birthday dinner a date....
Jack Bludis said…
Great to "hear" a chat among the great and near great of hardboiled and noir.

Good work, Gerald.
Anonymous said…
Dave, I think YOU would consider your mom's birthday dinner a date.
John R. said…
I know I'd consider it a date. Hey, Mrs White's quite a catch, y'know...
Anonymous said…
i may well consider CAPPING the lot of ye
and yes, Duane, in the FOOKING American sense of the word

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